Russian Dog Wizard Sizes Up Presidential Candidates – and More!
Tune in as Vladae Roytapel, better known as the Russian Dog Wizard and the “Dr. Phil of Dog Training,” assigns canine breeds to the presidential candidates based on their personalities. Find out which candidate behaves more like an Afghan hound puppy and which one yaps more like an Italian greyhound. Vladae also reveals secrets to communicating clearly and effectively with your dog – using a language he calls “doglish.” Don’t miss this show that features the man who put a leash on talk show host David Letterman and who has helped thousands learn how to have a better behaved canine.
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Man 1: “Oh, Behave!”
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Man 1: Oh, Behave, with your shagadelic host, Arden Moore. What's happening, Arden? Yes, baby, yes, yes. Tell us.
Arden Moore: Welcome to “Oh, Behave!” on Pet Life Radio. I'm your host, Arden Moore. Thank you for joining us. Today, we're going to go to Russia with love and back to the Detroit. You're wondering what the heck is that all about? We have an awesome guest. His name is Vladae Roytapel, but you probably know him better as the Russian Dog Wizard. He's also been called the Dr. Phil of dog training. He's going to be talking to us today about something called “doglish” and a whole bunch of other good things to make your dog’s tail wag with excitement.
Hey, Vladae, welcome to “Oh, Behave!”
Vladae Roytapel: Hello, Arden. Hello, everybody who is hearing me. You're listening to me right now, yes, it's going to be a lot of fun and I will talk a lot of interesting things and it will be straight to the point [xx].
Arden Moore: All right. We're going to be right back after this commercial break. You're listening to “Oh, Behave!” on Pet Life Radio.
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Arden Moore: Welcome back to Pet Life Radio. I'm your host, Arden Moore. As mentioned, we have Vladae Roytapel, also known as the Russian Dog Wizard. He's on our show today and I've got tell you, he's quite an amazing man. He came from Russia, he's now in the Detroit area but his talents when it comes to canines are global. In fact, he's been called the Dr. Phil of dog training and he has a secret weapon, it's called “doglish”. But before we get to that, I think we all deserve and need to know a little bit about who does Vladae really is?
Vladae, welcome to the show.
Vladae Roytapel: My pleasure to be here, Arden. Let me tell you and everyone who is listening to me right now, a little bit about my bio. Yes, I came from Russia with lust.
Arden Moore: Yes, OK.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, with lust. Yes, I am the great-grandson of the famous Russian biologist who was conducting Pavlov-type of research with the farm animals. As a child, I was observing how my grandfather was playing with little coyotes, little foxes, little wolves, and I think that type of love for the animals and the knowledge about the pet behavior was inherited to me from that time.
Arden Moore: What's your grandfather’s name? I know he's in the great [xx].
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, his last name is [xx] and the first name is Giorgi He was conducting Pavlov-type of research, that’s what I meant. Like I said, my dog, which is a much better [xx] I will reveal that secret weapon, but as for now, that’s what it is. So back in Russia, I was engaged in a lot of interesting things like doing dog sports. I was participating in the Russian shoots, like in America, Super Bowl of Adult Training. In actually couple of times, I trained dogs for a lot of agencies including the Russian government, even for KGB but this, don’t tell anyone.
Arden Moore: No, don’t worry, nobody listens. Doesn’t KGB stands for Kibble in a Great Bowl?
Vladae Roytapel: KGB is the former Soviet intelligence service. Come on, this is the FBI and CIA together.
Arden Moore: I thought it was Kibble in a Great Bowl. See what I [xx].
Vladae Roytapel: Oh, no, no. Trust me, if you have big ears and the long hands, so we have to just switch the topic. Anyway, yes, I trained for probably dogs 15 types of the service and that one was one of them. Plus, I trained dogs on the Russia-China border like Custom dogs, trained dog for police, and for Russian special forces like jumping from aircraft dogs and such and such.
So you know what, after all that experience, I came in this country and all that I do right now, starting the dogs from peeing, poo peeing, jumping, growling, buck, I mean it's like you ask brain surgeons to put the shot in the dog’s butt. It's so simple, I cannot tell you how simple it is. Plus, I have a fundamental education. I'm European-certified dog trainer behaviorist, I was certified in my native state of Moldova which is near Ukraine and Poland.
Arden Moore: Sounds very cold, very cold climate.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, and for some reasons, when you think about the Russia, you think about wild bears walking the empty streets and everyone is so dismal, it's not, it's not. We're a great people.
Arden Moore: You're anything but dismal. You put a lot of energy in your life, you've helped out thousands of people. Hey, I've even seen you on “The David Letterman Show”.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, did you see how I trained him? I put the leash on him?
Arden Moore: Yes, you walked him on a leash!
Vladae Roytapel: And I said, “Let me show you, David, how I train my clients. So you will be pretend dog and your name would be Labrador Retriever Max.” He looked at me and said, “No, I want to be the Collie.” I said, “Excuse me, the only Democrat dogs I know, they're Labs, and the rest of them Republicans.” He says, “OK, I will be Lab.”
As a matter of fact, I'm going to reveal one secret right now as we're doing the show right now. On the old Fox Stations across the country, we're running dogs Presidential campaign. So what I did, I basically matched every candidate for Presidency in the United States with the dog’s characteristics. So I matched the breed…
Arden Moore: Oh, this is great. Let's do it. Let's go through it. Do you want to do the Republican frontrunners first and then the Democrats frontrunners?
Vladae Roytapel: That’s the few who you love most?
Arden Moore: No, I'm an independent.
Vladae Roytapel: All right, OK. So who you want to ask me about?
Arden Moore: OK, let's talk about Mitt Romney. What kind of dog is he?
Vladae Roytapel: Mitt Romney is a Great Dane.
Arden Moore: Why do you say that?
Vladae Roytapel: Because he's back, because he's handsome, yes. It's important in this country being handsome. Come on, that’s why Bill Clinton was chosen. That’s one of the reasons why I'm on TV all the time.
Arden Moore: Well, you are a hottie, I know you're a hottie. You’re a Russian dog wizard
Vladae Roytapel: My Mom, as a kid, was telling me that, “You know, I'm not going to die for one thing, from self-modesty.” But my ambition has [xx] for that. But anyway, yes, he's a Great Dane.
Arden Moore: Romney. All right, so what about John McCain.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, but you know, there are some drawback to be a Great Dane. So in other words, he can sometimes be aggressive especially with the dogs of the same sex and that could be a big problem.
Arden Moore: OK, what about John McCain? I'm curious about him.
Vladae Roytapel: He's a German shepherd, he's a loyal guy, he's a German shepherd, OK? He's very good under security, can be very aggressive.
Arden Moore: OK, all right.
Vladae Roytapel: Give me a Democrat.
Arden Moore: OK, you know I'm going to ask Hillary Clinton.
Vladae Roytapel: Hillary Clinton is combination of she's the Cocker Spaniel and pit bull and Labrador scheme. What I mean by that?
Arden Moore: Oh, my gosh!
Vladae Roytapel: She should be a Labrador because Labrador is a Democrat dog, but you touch her and you will see pit bull face, and you know what? Maybe for some people may think it's negative, but I got to tell you, to live in the human earth, canine [xx] it's very important to be assertive on the issues. Listen, if any canine female knows just by being a nice girl, she’d never going to get a prestigious and spacious den. So every canine female knows if she would like to lead the pack, if she decided to lead the pack, she doesn’t care what is her gender is, she doesn’t care if she's female in other words or she's a Democrat. All what she cares, she's the dominant bitch and that’s what it is. It's so important to be also female in their relationship with another males in the human pack, and I think Hillary is very qualified for that.
Arden Moore: Well, I think this is the one exception where you could call a political candidate a bitch and get away with it because you're talking about a Cocker Spaniel, pit bull, and a Labrador mix. So I think that’s very, very [xx].
Vladae Roytapel: Exactly, I even mentioned on TV.
Arden Moore: Now, we got two other frontrunners in the Democratic slate, John Edwards. How do you see him?
Vladae Roytapel: He's a poodle. You know, I love the poodle.
Arden Moore: A poodle!
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, he's a poodle, Edwards is the poodle. I would myself would love to have a poodle if there is not search and rescue that’s involved in this country when the men owning the poodle.
Arden Moore: Real men do own poodles, all right?
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, a poodle as we both know, is the smartest breed. It is like PhD of the dog kingdom. On the negative part, pit bull can be sometimes too nosy and too hyper.
Arden Moore: Oh, interesting, interesting.
Vladae Roytapel: It is.
Arden Moore: Now, we have saved Obama Barack for last.
Vladae Roytapel: I think he's the more remind me Afghan hound, but puppy one, puppy one. As every puppy, we have hope, inspiration and all these things and sometimes clownish and things like that. But, he's a good guy and Afghan hound can be a very nice dog. Amongst the trainers, it has a reputation with low intelligence when it comes to their obedience training.
Arden Moore: OK. Have you shared your dog counterpart thought process with these candidates yet?
Vladae Roytapel: I shall with KGB first.
Arden Moore: OK, of course, you have to. Yes, yes, you definitely have to do that.
Vladae Roytapel: I called Vladimir Putin and ask him he's approval first. He was on the Time Magazine as a matter of fact. Did you see that?
Arden Moore: Oh, my gosh. Yes, yes, I did.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, he was, he was. So do you like my comparison? You can ask me about something else and everyone is Chihuahua. What is his name? Dennis?
Arden Moore: Oh, yes, yes. What about Huckabee, we forgot about Huckabee, yes?
Vladae Roytapel: Huckabee, Mike Huckabee? He would be foxhound, yes he would be. Why? Because fox hound, they play very well with its pack. Foxhound is almost Democratic dogs, they love everybody, they think everybody is a good guy, wants to be friendly with everyone. That’s the type of his strongest weapon.
I would like to also talk about Giuliani.
Arden Moore: Wait a minute, what's his downside to be a foxhound?
Vladae Roytapel: Foxhound, as every hound, it's just a one-job dog basically. He cannot do multiple tasks, he can just focus on one task at a time.
Arden Moore: OK, all right. Well, maybe if it's just the President, and not a canine bakery shop, maybe he could do the job. But if he try to do both, he may not be able to make it, right?
Vladae Roytapel: Exactly, yes. But that’s my perception about foxhound. Now, regarding Giuliani.
Arden Moore: All right. You know what? I got to tell you…oh yes, I forgot. You know more about candidates.
Vladae Roytapel: Giuliani.
Arden Moore: Yes. What is he?
Vladae Roytapel: He would be a greyhound, Italian greyhound.
Arden Moore: OK.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, and they are very loyal, they don’t bark too much, but if they bark, they mean business because they can be--even though they're small--they can be good watch dog. But the lack of loyalty, when they see something attractive is moving, they can just break away and catch that stuff with the speed of a Russian satellite-guided missile.
Arden Moore: Now, you're talking about women. Are you talking about his love life and his marriages here or what?
Vladae Roytapel: I don’t know what you…I'm talking about Italian greyhound. He has a strong predator instinct. He like to chase, and whatever you feel, we think if you read something between the lines, it's up to you.
Arden Moore: Oh, very diplomatic! You've been really KGB trained. I'm impressed.
Vladae Roytapel: I was, so be careful.
Arden Moore: Well, I want everybody to know we are speaking with Vladae Roytapel who is known as the Russian Dog Wizard. He has an amazing website.
Vladae Roytapel: World famous Russian Dog Wizard.
Arden Moore: World famous, pardon me, ControlYourPet.com, everybody’s got to go there.
Vladae Roytapel: ControlYourPet.com, people. If your dog is taking you for a walk, jump at you, growling, bite whatever it is, I have an ultimate solution. You can go to ControlYourPet.com, no kissing and hugging. Just ControlYourPet.com, you’ll find all those solutions in my amazing DVD “Obedience for Life”.
Arden Moore: And you have been here in the United States, I guess, since 1995. You came from Russia.
Vladae Roytapel: About 10 years, yes. I was here about 10 years, and I enjoy this country.
Arden Moore: How did you get to Detroit? Are you like a Motown singer and on the side?
Vladae Roytapel: No, by that time economic in Michigan--right now, it really, really sucks--but before, it was so great a state and we really had a [xx]. I think the American government decided it would be a good match for me here. So because I did not reveal to them, so I just came as dog trainer. I didn’t even know that my expertise would be…you know honestly, I hadn’t even know people on this country have so many problems with their pets and we can talk about that why but I think I have an answer to that.
Arden Moore: Well, we're going to take a quick break because we're going to address that. Folks, you're listening to “Oh, Behave!” on Pet Life Radio. I'm your host, Arden Moore. We are speaking with the world famous…
Vladae Roytapel: Thank you.
Arden Moore: …Russian Dog Wizard Vladae Roytapel, and we're going to be back right after this break.
Man 1: Would you like to go out? [dog barking]. Not you, I was talking to your owner. I'm on a date, baby. Yes, you and me. “Oh, Behave!” will be right back after these groovy shagadelic messages. Oh, yes!
Man 1: We are switched back on, baby, yes. So, let's talk pets with our smashing host, pet edu-tainer, Arden Moore, and the groovy show that’s cool, baby! Really shagadelic, “Oh, Behave!”
Arden Moore: Welcome back, we are listening to “Oh, Behave!” on Pet Life Radio. I'm your host, Arden Moore. We have the world famous Russian Dog Wizard, Vladae Roytapel with us. I don’t speak Russian but I don’t think it matters because with you're going to try to help our listeners with just to speak a very important and little known language called “doglish”. Can you explain that, Vladae?
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, and I'm going to show that secret in one minute, but before I go into that, let me tell them and you why I believe in this country--which is I strongly believe, the best country in the world--but when it comes to the raising of kids or pets, which is basically almost the same, we have so many problems. I think kids and pets out of control has become the symptoms of American society. Let me tell you why, because I think for the people in this country, democracy reigns supreme. People in this country like to treat everyone equally, and kids and parents and teachers and students, even [xx] student, Saddam Hussein, you humans and the dogs.
Let me rediscover for you the old truth, if you'd treat you dog as the human people, your dog will eventually treat you as the dog. So many people confused democracy with [xx] and love was indulging and the dog confuse their kindness for weakness and take advantage of them and run their home and their life. So they call me to rescue and I tell them, “Listen, I will rescue you from your own pet because from love to behave, sometimes it's one step. People love their pets, the pets start to pee, poop, jump, bite and now they hate it. So they call me to rescue them and I said, “but you have to follow the rules.”
Arden Moore: OK, give us the rules.
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, my rules are, let me reveal for you three major rules which I always apply in the place, and I did not create those rules. I am not the creator, I'm a messenger so don’t shoot me, please. So rules came from Canine Society from the Doggy Mom. Doggy Mom knows better how to raise their child. Number one rule, canine mom never say anything which she cannot enforce. Canine Mom always reinforce what she says. Canine Mom never repeat what she says. Canine Mom says once in the form of growling and after she snaps, it is the human moms sometimes tells to its kids and canine kids so many times without any consequences.
So the first thing that people should do [xx] democracy which is maybe great things for human consumption but yes, we know that. I got to tell the truth as it is, which is a great thing for most humans. But when it comes to the dogs, people, your dog needs as much democracy as the penguins need underwear in the Russian winter. I got to tell you that.
Now, let's talk about the doglish. Yes, I talk to the dog in the dog language, doglish, and again, when the people go to my website which is ControlYourPet.com or just Google Russian Dog Wizard, my Web page will come up, they can see all those secrets revealed in my DVD “Obedience For Life” but I would like to give them three major let's talk about the tone of the voices which is one of the more important things. The rest of them they can find there.
Arden Moore: Yes, especially since we run our radio show, this is really good service to our listeners. So go ahead, Vladae, I'm all ears.
Vladae Roytapel: Thank you, thank you. So the dogs will communicate in three ways: high pitch tone of voice is always associated with happiness into the same “Good boy! Good girl!” A lot of men have problem with that. My [xx] clients told me, they can't even place them right, so you have to say. Yes, good owners are like good manager, you need to tell the people. “Good job! Good boy!” high pitch. “Good girl! Good boy!” [Makes dog sound] That’s canine way of happiness, that’s a canine mom praising a good child by [xx].
Arden Moore: Do it again, do it again.
Vladae Roytapel: Good girl! Good Arden! Good girl! [Makes dog sound]. OK?
Arden Moore: My two dogs are listening to you, you got both of my dogs here, Tipper and Cleo, and they're like, “We love him. We love him!”
Vladae Roytapel: Yes, I'm not a bad guy. Nothing [xx] involve anything. I'm a very good guy. As a matter of fact, I'm more firm on the dogs’ owners because they're more hard headed than their pets and changing them is much more difficult because prior to coming to me, they had maybe 20, 50 years of life experience. They don’t have just a couple of years, so you needed to change them rather than to train the old dogs to do new tricks.
Anyway, by opposite, when you disapprove something, don’t say, “No! No! No!” I truly believe most dogs in this country think no is their nicknames because people use it so many times without consequences. You have to tell them in canine vocabulary. [Makes growling sounds]. That’s the sound the dog is hearing. Now, if you were after that, sharp movement forwards which invasion of personal space and as you make that sound, you froze, freezing means if you make one another move, I'm going to bite--the dog bites after they freeze--so if you do it simultaneously, it creates tremendous disciplinary effect.
You see, don’t need to grab two by four but do abusive actions, you just need to talk to the dogs in their language. I'm barking commands instead of saying, “Let's go.” I say, Let's go, [dog sounds]. Down, sit, so it's kind of more like breath type of conversation when I'm giving commands. And there are a lot of things. People can find the DVD that is if you sharply move over the shoulders means sit, [xx] over their shoulders means down, moving forward, one thing moving backwards, another thing, it's so interesting thing.
Arden Moore: Well, what you're talking about it sounds like a couple of things: one, the tone is very important; but secondly, is the consistency in what you're doing so that you and your dog are learning the same language and actually communicating more clearly and consistently. Correct?
Vladae Roytapel: At this the same level, you are absolutely right, at the same level. Don’t expect your dogs, people, learn English. You should learn the doglish because you are a more developed specie, and we humans have everything, everything to successfully communicate with the pets. All what we don’t have is the tail, the rest of things we have. So we can show and indicate, it's very spectacular what I'm doing and again and again, people can Google Russian Dog Wizard or go to ControlYourPet.com and find everything about me.
Arden Moore: Well, I think it's a very, very important because you made an amazing point. I hear people everywhere saying, “No! No! No!” and like you say, that could be a dog’s nickname. You actually have to communicate to the dog to let them know what they should be doing and no means nothing. Correct?
Vladae Roytapel: Exactly. Dogs communicate through their actions, not just with words. No matter what you say, of course, you can say in the way that they would understand but it matters what you've done. Every specie in this world including people, your husband, you're boyfriend, girlfriend, kids, dogs, whosoever, needs to know where their sense line is. If you don’t show it to them, they will show it to you and you cannot show it by inaction, you can show it by action. But again, action should be something--don’t get me wrong with any kind of abusive actions or whatever--it should be like dog talk, canine conversation. You’ll say, you’ll froze, you’ll act, in my conversation I'm using my human hands as the canine key. If I need to correct, I use special acupuncture points and I make sharp movements with my hand like indicating dog bites, but sometimes it's unnecessary because if you do right first part, [xx] communicate it right, you don’t even need to go to another physical level.
Arden Moore: Well, that’s great. Now, when it comes to teaching people, who do you see as your better [xx] people, men or women?
Vladae Roytapel: I think, behavior problem, pets never a problem for their husbands because their husbands are never home. Yes, of course. But the woman, yes, they are much diligent and they want to do see, the men take it as a personal failure, he's a failure. He takes in a fancy mood, maybe defensive, whatever you call in proper English. But the woman, they are like that there is something wrong and they want to change it, but again, that is two different types of people. Some people want to change the things but they don’t want to think anything to change. They want to eat their cake and have it, too.
You and I know, it's OK when the dog’s jump on the furniture, for instance, and sleep in your bed as long as they behave well. But if they don’t behave well, you have to cut out these privileges, and sometimes you tell the people about that and they look at you and you're like just ask them to commit a murder. Come on, I mean, yes, they had one person who had two dogs, Labrador and Rottweiler. So how he said to me, one is Democrat, the other a Republican, and that’s why he kept them in separate cages. But the thing is, besides they fight between themselves, the Republican one which is the Rottweiler bit the person 12 times. So I said to him, “Listen, where does your dog sleep?” I asked that lady, and she said, “In my bed.” I said, “Listen, if I slept with you in your bed, I would not [xx].” After that, when I said pick the dog from the bed, she said, “But he’ll [xx]. He wants to sleep in the bed. He will be too sad.” So listen, she already bit you 12 times, you need to12 times dead already for the things which she’d done to you, what are you talking about? When you lose your head, don’t cry about the hair, pick the dog out of the bed.
Arden Moore: I think what you're saying, Vladae, because you are from Detroit and there is that song called “Arias PECT” from your singer there, I think what you're saying is people need to realize that our dogs, as much as we love them and they are members of our family, they actually have to earn privileges and they still need to know who’s the benevolent but consistently [xx].
Vladae Roytapel: Exactly, dogs ask the keys, they want to know. Everyday, they look in their owner’s eyes every morning and say, “Are you there? Are you my leader right now?” Because once the human becomes the leader for them, their life momentarily becomes different. They become more calm, relax, so they don’t need to worry about everything, anything. I always ask my client, “When was your primetime of life?” They said, “Well, before 80.” I said, “You know why, because you didn’t have too much responsibilities.” Responsibilities make you and dogs unhappy, the more responsibilities you take, the less your dog will have and the more happy he will be. I learned in the long run your dog will be very more happy, more obedient if he doesn’t need to make all the decisions. He’ll just follow your orders like it wasn't the dog’s, his mom pecks, his Mom sometimes growls, sometimes licks, sometimes snaps, and he was happy about that.
My dear, I hate to tell you, but I have to go because I have to continue to do Fox Network all these things regarding Presidential campaign. So we’ll be on the air probably 30-40 minutes from now, but I would like to thank you very much for having me and allowing me to share in my way how I view the healthy relationship between the pets and their owners. I love the dogs more than anything in this world, even my wife was my client long ago, and everything I achieved thankful to the animals and thanks to the dogs but I always balance that love with [xx] structures. My dogs walk with me everywhere I go without leash. You know why? Because they behave. If they behave, I take them with me everywhere I go. That’s what my business [xx] Frammington, Michigan where we are teaching our clients we're turning them basically to be acceptable member of our human society where we can take them with us everywhere with confidence and the dogs are not becoming prisoners in our backyard or under house arrest.
Arden Moore: I am very happy that you have come from Russia to help us out here in America and people everywhere in the world. We are listening to Vladae Roytapel, the world famous Russian Dog Wizard. He's got to zip off now but I want to thank you again for being a guest on our show, and we want everyone to go to www.ControlYourPet.com.
Vladae Roytapel: No kissing and hugging, control your pet. When you control your pet, you can have the kiss and hug but not before. Yes, that’s very important for us.
Thank you so much for listening to me and I wish you would invite me the next time and I will share more tips and suggestions.
Arden Moore: Definitely. All right, thank you very much, Vladae.
Vladae Roytapel: Thank you.
Arden Moore: We are listening to “Oh, Behave!” on Pet Life Radio. I'm your host, Arden Moore. As mentioned, we had a great guest here, Vladae Roytapel, and I also what to thank my producer for making the show possible.
You can learn more about Vladae, he's got some DVDs and audio CDs on ControlYourPet.com. If you'd like to know any more about this show or transcripts of this show or any other show on Pet Life Radio Network, just zip over to PetLifeRadio.com and click on the “Oh, Behave!” show. If you have any questions, comments or ideas for our show, please email me at Arden@PetLifeRadio.com.
So until next time, this is your flea-free host, Arden Moore, delivering just two words for all you two, three, and four leggers out there, “Oh, Behave!”
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